*I’ll Be Home for Peacemas is available right here on ShannonONeil.net for just $10 thru Dec. 15th or in eBook form at one of these websites: Amazon.com ($3.99), BarnesandNoble.com($3.19), Smashwords.com ($3.99). This week, I’m offering a holiday sneak peek of the first five chapters of the book. Enjoy!*

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4

[ Chapter 5 ]

Thursday / December 20, 2007

In the time it took for me to return to my apartment from the police precinct, news of Boston’s now infamous “Santa Slugger” had slipped beyond the borders of Beantown, right into the national spotlight. Officer Dawson was apparently correct in his assessment that it was a slow news day, because the twenty-four-hour national media networks could hardly wait to run the story. Not only did they show the video of my impromptu interview in the back of the police car, they also added a very unflattering picture of me from Facebook, along with an illustration of Santa Claus (just in case people were unsure of who it was that I had so viciously assaulted).

Additionally, the Boston PD apparently had some “computer trouble” that rendered them incapable of sending out a follow-up press release to these news stations that “Santa” had, in fact, turned out to be a stoner with a record. Continue reading “I’ll Be Home for Peacemas: Chapter 5” »

*I’ll Be Home for Peacemas is available right here on ShannonONeil.net for just $10 thru Dec. 15th or in eBook form at one of these websites: Amazon.com ($3.99), BarnesandNoble.com($3.19), Smashwords.com ($3.99). This week, I’m offering a holiday sneak peek of the first five chapters of the book. Enjoy!*

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3

[ Chapter 4 ]

Thursday / December 20, 2007

What my mother didn’t know when I hung up on her, was that our little conversation would actually wind up being the catalyst for my Christmas homecoming debacle. The guilt trips might not have produced her desired outcome on impact, but their residual effects wound up being a key factor in leading me to get on a plane to Florida the next day.

But I’m getting ahead of myself.

After I turned my phone off and tossed it into the bottomless pit of my purse, I tried to clear my head and reclaim my positive feelings from earlier in the day. I pictured Fred’s smiling face encouraging me to continue with my excursion to the mall even though the thought of facing the holiday shopping crowd was suddenly making my bowels cramp.

I had just about talked myself out of my funk when I came upon my second subtle geriatric messenger of the day. This one was a leather-skinned homeless man with stooped shoulders in a Santa suit outside Bloomingdale’s . The heavily worn suit appeared to be as old as its wearer. It had faded to a dark, bubble-gum hue with enough holes in it that it might have been used at one time to tame a bull. Now, it hung loosely off the old man, who was proffering a bright red pail with one hand and ringing a rusty bell with the other. Continue reading “I’ll Be Home for Peacemas: Chapter 4” »

*I’ll Be Home for Peacemas is available right here on ShannonONeil.net for just $10 thru Dec. 15th or in eBook form at one of these websites: Amazon.com ($3.99), BarnesandNoble.com($3.19), Smashwords.com ($3.99). This week, I’m offering a holiday sneak peek of the first five chapters of the book. Enjoy!*

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2

[ Chapter 3 ]

Thursday / December 20, 2007

So now that we’ve got that out of the way, let’s move on to the second beginning of my story—the day I was assaulted by Santa Claus.

One of my favorite job perks as a self-employed graphic designer is that I have the ability to make my own schedule. Since I’m a night person by nature, I choose to do most of my work during the hours after the sun’s departure. With the support of my colleagues (Nick at Nite and Diet Coke) I can usually work well into the wee hours of the morning before making the short commute (about five seconds) from the desk to my bed, where I collapse into a deep sleep.

As a consequence, I rarely drag myself out of bed before two or three in the afternoon. That is, unless some inconsiderate soul decides to get my day off to a rotten start by rudely interrupting my beauty sleep—which is exactly what happened on the morning in question. Continue reading “I’ll Be Home for Peacemas: Chapter 3” »